Big City vs. Small Town

Despite the bad rap - For toddlers, there are distinct advantages to raising a child in the city - or at least in the Kiev Micro Region where we lived.  Number one advantage - was that I didn't really need to look for a way to entertain her (except of cold and rainy days)  I just had to walk out of my apartment to one of the many playgrounds around our building and there would be at least 1 but sometimes as many as 20 other small children her age, all running around and stealing each other's toys. on the way to or from the park, I did grocery shopping and got her back in time for lunch and a nap.

We have been in a Alister's home town in Northern Ireland since February.  It was nice to miss the cold weather they had in Kiev - but some days it is pretty hard to find something to do.  In small towns where people are car dependent and where the weather is cool and rainy - you don't find people with small children flocking to the play parks.  True - There are playgroups - on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday we make our way to the specified location and sit for two hours as the children play and get a snack - all for a pound!  Well worth it if the weather is rainy!  Sunday is Church and Family day and so that leaves Monday, Tuesday, and Saturday (and holidays when play group doesn't operate) to find something to occupy Saphira.

We walk a lot - and it is a good thing Saphira is a good walker and that our town has more to offer than the one I grew up in.  Often our walk looks like this:  Over to the post office to either put cards in the mailbox or say "hello" to it and then down the street to window shop in the two chemists and the Thrift store.  I then browse the short dated aisle of the grocery store and we continue walking down to the Animal Auction.  Monday is Sheep day and Tuesday is Cow day.  There is a public restroom there, and for some reason Saphira always likes to stop there for a potty break (once out of necessity - but after that she always says she has to go potty whenever we pass it - so we stop and she goes).  We watch the animals unload, listen to the impregnable chatter of the auctioneer (Saphira has started shouting out numbers - but so far the auctioneer hasn't taken her up on her bids) and sometimes if we are lucky we get to pet an animal.  Saphira REALLY likes visiting the auction house and brings up our animal encounters ferquently.

If the weather is dry, we go to a playground in the morning or afternoon, and normally we visit her grandparents in the afternoon after her nap as well.

Dentists

Dentists in the former Soviet Union don't have a positive reputation. From purchased diplomas to procedures designed to make you have to have more procedures - the general advice is that it is better to stay away from them if possible. You just are never quite sure who you can trust. So when my doctor at Dobrobut said I "had" to go to the Dentist to get a certificate saying that I had healthy teeth - I was wary. But I also figured - how much harm can a dentist do if you just go in for a cleaning?

I had also recently joined Groupon UA and they were advertising Ultrasonic Airflow cleaning. When one came up at a dentist in my area I decided to kill two birds with one stone.

Conclusion? I don't think that they can do damage with a cleaning, but I don't have enough dental vocabulary - WOW is that an area where I am REALLY lost. I did get that the dentist thinks I have a cavity - but as it is UNDER a place that was sealed by my dentist to prevent cavities - I'm skeptical and have decided that I'll wait and go to the UK dentist or my trusty US Dentist to have my sealants replaced and the cavity investigated. She also told me they were having a "sale" on fillings. That really confirmed the wait factor :-)

it was also the first time I had had an Ultrasonic airflow cleaning. I did NOT like the cleaning stuff used as it doesn't taste pleasant and burns a bit - but my teeth are clean, sparkly white - more sparkly than the last few cleanings I had (those were in the UK) and I was in and out in 15 minutes with that super clean feeling - so pretty impressive. Also impressive was the groupon price - 145 UAH or 18 dollars - of course this was a sale as it should have been 500 uah (62 usd) In the UK, my last cleanings were 25 gbp - or 32 USD. I think my last US cleaning - was around $80, but that was in 2007, so not to sure on how prices compare there anymore and how much this type of technological cleaning would cost.

china-lish

Sorry about the bad quality - but we use the box to store the train and I'm not ready to destroy it just to get it to fit on the scanner.

The perfect toasted sandwich

If I was a photographer foody, there would be a delectable picture here of a sandwich: brown and crispy, the cheese melting and spilling out of the sides, the plate lightly sprinkled with crumbs or maybe the nut and seed mix lining the crust. I am not a foody - nor a photographer - so you will have to trust me that fall and this cold pre-wintery weather is perfect for a toasted cheese sandwich with chutney.

Chutney was made for toasted cheese sandwiches. If you're using a super wonderful fragrant cheese, like stilton or blue - of course, you may want to pass on the chutney. but for anything blander - a mild chedder, american, gouda. Chutney makes that plain-jane sandwich pop. It makes an ordinary snack into a savory treat. I know all this because I had the great fortune of smearing a piece of toast with chutney while in the UK and eating it with cheese. Soon after this, I melted the cheese. The rest was WOW and I can't really ever go back to the way a toasted cheese sandwich tasted before - that crunch of oil, salt, and gooey cheese is just . . . .. flat.

Today is a cold day and I am sitting with a bowl of soup and a toasted sandwich - bemoaning the fact that I barely had the time to make applesauce this year, let alone chutney. Maybe in 2 or 4 years, I'll find the time to pursue "hobbies" again. Until then I will dream of chutney and enjoy it on our stints out of Ukraine.

If you do want to make your own chutney - an excellent recipe one can be found here. But even in the US, you can find chutney in a supermarket.

Diaper bags

I've been looking at diaper bags on-line recently. The price and style ranges are mind numbing - and for exactly that reason I am loath to buy anything without seeing it in person and really pawing through all the pockets. Video reviews are helpful . . . . but still. I've also decided that the absolute perfect diaper bag has yet to be manufactured for me. I'm hoping that maybe a company when doing product research will randomly stumble upon my post and design my bag - and of course give it to me for free :-) But this is crazy talk. Still, I'm going to link like mad in the random hope it might happen.

My bag would be lightweight like the Fluerville re-run Hanna. It would also be similarly sized to the Hana as well as the Skip Hop Studio and sadly discontinued City Chic. After much measuring and estimating - my ideal bag would be 16 x 10-12 x 6. This sized bag is wide enough to access everything, not too deep to lose everything, and not longer than the bars of my stroller. It would not be overly bulky, but would allow me to carry the essentials for lets say 2 kids and myself with the stroller basket having kid toys in it.

My perfect bag doesn't have insulated compartments. I don't reheat things for Saphira, and fortunately we didn't have to bother with bottles, but frankly I don't want the weight.

In appearance, I also like the Hana in that it is nondescript. It doesn't look too much like a bag, or too much like a fancy purse. Still, I love the idea of the purse bag - the going out to dinner and having a nice bag that is your diaper bag and purse - just like the well organized and super heavy Amymichelle bags.

My bag would come with stroller clips/ties, have good organization pockets, and have a wee clip that could be fastened to your belt loop, or an Ergo strap, to keep it anchored, but not have to switch to a backpack mode as that just looks stupid. If I wanted a backpack, I'd get a backpack. This clip is vital. If you have a bag on your shoulder and you bend forward, the bag flies forward. It doesn't matter the size of the bag, small or large gravity pulls it forward. And if you happen to have a small child in the path of the flying bag . . . . . . Well lets just say I can't imagine why such a clip hasn't been invented yet.

My bag would cost $30, $40 max and would still be quality enough to hold up to sand, crumbs, water, and being banged around. One reason I don't want to buy a bag online is that despite what seem to be very positive designs of the Hana and Studio bags - there also seem to be a goodly number of reviewers who had problem with quality - and well, I can't really return it can I? The cheaper bags, the k-mart, wal-mart variety may work - my ideal may even be out there - but they don't really have reviewers and video bag tours do they? This would be my only bag. I've never liked switching things from bag to bag - the only time I might want something else is when we fly - and then I will just want something Big (cram that 10k in!) - so it would need to be functional and sturdy for everyday use.

I thought about a messenger style bag - it would be handy for Alister to be willing to carry a bag, but when I thought realistically about how often he would need to carry the bag, and if the bag was small and compact, he wouldn't need to carry it anyway. I'm also unconvinced about the organization of the messenger bag. I think I'd really like to see it. Plus, I just want to feel a bit more feminine so an elegant bag is more up my line.

So for now, I found a really cheap bag at the rinok and am making some hack changes to see if I can make it do some of the things I want. Granted, it is a bit smaller than my ideal, but I only have one kid and think I can make it work. Trial run this Sunday - which is the ultimate test since I have to be prepared for a 9:30 - 3pm absence from the house and from any amenities. We'll see.

Double Dog Dare You

Back on the playground as a mom, I sometimes feel that not much has changed. The kids are running around, flocking to whatever looks interesting, and doing what they see the other kids do. Eventually they'll get older and while they might not immediately do what the other kids do, they will be urged along and dared to do the same or even greater fits of daring. But what I didn't expect is that to some degree, the mothers are still repeating the same pattern themselves. We talk; we chat; we sidle over to the group that seems to be having the most interesting conversation. We find out who is eating what, buying what where, and doing what to counter some behaviour - then we go out and do the same. We make suggestions, receive suggestions and find ourselves under motherly peer-pressure to perform. I double dog dare you.

One mother always come to the playground with her crocheting. She has crocheted three sunbonnets and when last I saw her she was halfway through a child's dress. She also manages to make jewelry. (I wish I could manage to have the dishes washed each night). She is amazing. I mentioned to her that I also crochet and soon found myself in possession of multiple crochet patterns, a book of crochet stitches, and links to an on-line crochet forum.

Now, I do know how to crochet - but I haven't been truly taught. My Aunt Helene taught me how to crochet a basic rag rug and a loopy doily. She taught me without the use of terms or books and the only term I knew was a Chain stitch. Fifteen years later, I made friends with various grannies in Croatia and they made doilies and tablecloths and all sorts of lovely, lovely stuff. They resurrected my past learning and taught me to look at a doily and make a copy. That winter, I spent lots of time huddled under a blanket making little doily copies. Finally, I attempted my first pattern. The pattern was in German. The women spoke Croatian. We looked at the signs and symbols and I managed to get far enough to ask them what to do when I hit a hard spot. I left Croatia in 2005 and in 2008 I finally finished that 10x10 doily. I've since made three baby blankets, 1 rag rug, and a pair of mary jane baby booties. I still can't read a pattern and I still don't know the English, German, or Croatian terms. Without YouTube, I would be lost. Now, I suddenly have a pile of Russian patterns. It's like handing a sheet of music to someone who can only play by ear.

I made some copies of the crochet book patterns and dutifully looked at the websites and magazines. When I returned the book, I told her I made copies and then wondered to myself why?, when will I find time to do it? Most days I feel over booked with Saphira, ministry secretarial duties, church, house, Seminary accounting, editing, the baby book I'm trying to put together, and the long overdue book I'm trying to get together for our nieces and nephews. Still, a few days later, walking home with Saphira I suddenly remembered a little skirt that some friends at church gave to Saphira and which has only been worn once for lack of a shirt that coordinates. I was walking past the market and suddenly charged into it and headed straight to the yarn stall. How many skeins do I need to make a shirt, I asked? And soon found myself in possession of 200 grams of fine cotton yarn and no idea what I was doing.

Too many days of internet research later and this is my goal. We'll soon see if I manage to finish something before winter, before she grows out of it, or how much mischief accepting a double dog dare will get me into.

Made in China

I don't know how it works in America, esp in the cities - but here the mothers with the children congregate in a park or a playground and let the children play. Sometime there can be as many as 15 toddlers with their parents, strollers, bicycles,and toys in toy running here and there at the accustomed meeting point.

At this age, the children do not play together. They are more interested in what toys the other children brings and normally the children will run up to the newcomer's stroller and peer into the basket, the more badly behaved ones pulling the toys out themselves. The mantras of the mother's include: Don't touch someone else's stroller, don't take things, and nelza - which basically means don't by any means - or a very strong no.

You listen as the mothers yell at their children and you learn the kids', but not the mothers', names. You begin to talk to the mothers who are there often and the ones you like you may learn their names and start arranging to meet. The mother's watch their children, chat, talk on the cell phone, and play interference when needed.

And the children play, bouncing from toy to toy as the fancy strikes them. Balls, strollers, musical animals you pull on a string, clack-clack toys, shape sorter toys, shovels, buckets, trucks, toy phones- an entire toy shop distributed between the stroller baskets and strewn beneath the trees. Most of the toys cheap (balls 50 cents, stroller $5, toy phone $1.25), some of them broken (but the kids don't care), and all of them from China. Many of the toys are the same, because if a parent sees that their child likes something the chances are that they will buy it for their child (it is slightly embarrassing if your child is always after anther child's toy)- but all the same they prefer to play with the other children's toys over their own - until their own toy has been claimed by another child. The best thing about the toys is that they cheap - not all toys - just the ones you see on the street. It doesn't matter if it gets lost or broken or picked up by another kid. One mother says she loves the 10 uah toys because she can buy them and feel like she is getting something for her child and not feel guilty about the money - though the money does eventually add up. And aside from the bicycles - it is often the cheapest toys that the children like most. Plastic shovels, for instance, are wildly popular. Not to dig with necessarily - but just to walk around with.

It is fascinating to watch, and rather enjoyable to be a part of, especially if your child is well fed and rested that day. You learn the latest child rearing gossip - the cheapest diapers, the foods the other children are eating, the rumor that raw carrots will prevent cavities. I'm quite enjoying it.